Sometimes people think, "oh Jordy is a known boy, and can take care of this spider". But you see, not only will I not do that, but I now consider that room off limits. That's the spider's room now.
"How can a spider be cute?" you ask, incredulous. I pull this photo out of my wallet:
@jordyd tfw you scramble to re-hide the spider image and accidentally open it full-screen
@kimdanes you'll have to replace the whole device now
@jordyd speaking of, I saw 3 spiders yesterday. I was pretty close to just burning the place down
@kimdanes it's the only way to be sure
@jordyd there is a youtube series of an animated cute spider
if I remembered the name I would link it
* stares pointedly at the rest of the audience *
@lopsigon I'm sure someone on the web knows where the spider is
@jordyd They'd better. Maybe I'll go ask the driders if they know. Maybe I have some orc grog leftover.
@jordyd This reminds me of an old classic...
https://www.everything2.com/title/there%2527s+a+spider+in+my+keyboard
@JordiGH heart wrenching
@jordyd I just remembered, Jake Brahm, the author of that vignette, got into some serious shit for making a bomb hoax on 4chan:
@jordyd I once ceded my bedroom to a praying mantis until my boyfriend could get out the Tupperware bowl and paper
@emmykei I'm cool with praying mantises personally, they're just fitey boys
@jordyd they don’t creep me out like spiders do, but it was so large that all I could think was “sorry for intruding on your space sir have a nice day”
@emmykei an understandable & considerate response
Unless the spider is cute and then he's my buddy and I'll transport him outside