say it with me, don't be afraid:
all white people are racist!
until white people no longer benefit from white supremacy in any way, this will always be true. you're not special because you do that thing. if you did it expecting a cookie or a gold star, you're doing it wrong.
it's not good enough to just be "not racist", we need to be anti-racist! we have to dismantle the power structure that allows white supremacy to live.
-- a fellow white person