Over an hour on the phone to my drunk mum offloading about her relationship and being weird and kind of upset and maybe paranoid but maybe I internalised gaslighting of her but also she's definitely weird :/ but had terrible time in life too. No wonder I don't answer the phone. But also I feel terrible for being withdrawn b/c I find the relationship so difficult

@Damage some people are just hard to have relationships with, and that includes parents. Even if your mother were totally average and normal (whatever that means), you might still have a hard time with her. Parents aren't any easier to get along with just because you've known them for longer; it's okay to find that relationship stressful, the same as any other. I have kinda the same problem, and my mom is pretty ordinary.