I was going through my paper mail this morning, and I found a letter from the school district where I used to do time as a kid. Apparently the high school English department head found out that I've written a couple of novels, and wants to make my first one required summer reading.

I'm horrified by this. I don't want a captive audience, and I don't want people to grow up despising my work because it was shoved down their throats at school. Save that shit for when I'm dead and buried, please.