Should I ever be implicated in a crime, I have an airtight alibi:

*me:* But officer, did you find any traces of hair from a grey British Shorthair cat?
*they:* ah, no, what are you trying say?
*me:* Look, couldn't have been me. There is literally not a square centimetre in my environment, my clothing etc., that doesn't have those fibres.

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Cop: [thinking] so I just need to go "find" some cat hair...

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