An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but once you level up to three or four you can even ward off undergraduates

@phooky at 8 apples, even friends and relatives begin to avoid you

around 10-11, small mammals and most birds are repelled

at 15 apples a day, even plants will wilt at your approach; only cockroaches can come near you.


@ranjit at twenty apples a day you start to repel soil and rocks; at twenty-five you can usually achieve flight, but at least sixty to seventy apples a day are required for interplanetary travel

· · Web · 1 · 0 · 2

@phooky unfortunately, due to the extreme forces involved, it is difficult to acquire apples or to keep apples on your person.

@ranjit it is to solve precisely this problem that the McIntosh ramjet was developed

Sign in to participate in the conversation

The social network of the future: No ads, no corporate surveillance, ethical design, and decentralization! Own your data with Mastodon!