i want to have children, whether my own or adopted. but honestly, i never wanted to grow up, i want to go back. that's something that i can't do, sadly. so i guess that's why i want children, so i can experience childhood again, even if it's through the eyes of a parent, an outsider, i'm not the kid here. idk. people tell me to still be a kid on the inside but it's not that same whimsical feeling.