So could I just go "Hey I'm a weird gay enby pagan furry, ask me anything" and people would, and it would not be terrible?
Let's try it out!
@latrani given that you're enby, does that mean the descriptor 'gay' refers to your sex rather than gender?
@Gargoylezoo Nope! (Even if it did, I've done enough transition that assigning me a 'biological sex' is a murky proposition at best. ;))
It's just self-identification term that feels right to me. The best I can explain it is I see/use 'gay' as a sort of cultural signifier, referring to how I conceive of and relate with my sexuality.
@latrani Interesting! It's too bad we don't have better language for things in the middle of the various spectra, especially how they relate to one another.
@Gargoylezoo I know, right? The whole gender-stuff world is a fascinating ferment of terminologies at this point, I'd love to see what comes out of it in a few years.
All this being said, the 'gay' label also just works pretty well on a practical level for me. My presentation generally reads as 'femmy/soft male' these days, and I usually seek the same, so... ;)
@latrani Ok, so you're using 'gay' to sort of mean 'I'm interested in people in the same part of the gender spectrum'?
@Gargoylezoo It works out that way, but the original intention was really still more "I identify with m/m culture even if I'm not male". But yeah, if it didn't have that sort of practical accuracy, I probably would not be using that term. :)
@Gargoylezoo (2/2) It's also meant to have a 'soft' gender implication, but that's not terribly clear since English doesn't have an unambiguous word for gay-as-in-male. I know several folks who call themselves non-binary lesbian, which is a bit clearer since we DO have a word for gay-as-in-female.
The other thing that label does is it allows me to get into this sort of conversation/explanation, which I admit I do rather enjoy. :) Sorry for the walls of text. ;)