The Surprise Party is the ultimate dick move
@rotatingskull it is AT BEST a violation of consent that /coincidentally/ worked out alright
@kimdanes It only works out all right because it puts the party reciever on the spot to accept it. There’s so much social pressure to recieve this gift that telling everyone to just leave you the fuck alone will only be done by the very most forthright of people.
@kimdanes @rotatingskull there are plenty of ways of pre-consenting to surprise parties without ruining the surprise..........
@nightpool @rotatingskull that is honestly a very good point. I hadn't thought of that. I suspect it would be a fringe case, however. I feel the usual idea is to do it and /hope/ they're fine with having the party.
@kimdanes @rotatingskull I dunno. I may be biased because I just had a friend describe to me a very successful surprise party a friend threw them while they were visiting.
I think, kind of like anything else, it depends on KNOWING the person in question and what they're comfortable with. like, a surprise party can just be three or four people if that's what the person would enjoy.
@kimdanes @rotatingskull I feel like a lot of the bad rap surprise parties get is just asshole 'friends' trying to force people to do things they know they wouldn't be comfortable with normally.
@nightpool @rotatingskull agreed. Also (in my experience) family members pulling a power move
@kimdanes @rotatingskull sure. and that shit is 100% fucked up. but I don't think it means the entire concept of surprise parties is bullshit. I think it means your family members are grade-A assholes.
@kimdanes nor is the Surprise Dick a good party move.
@MightyBigCar there are few, if any, situations where it IS a good move
@kimdanes Agree. It’s a way to turn a good thing (a party) into a power move.