@garfiald i have an a 1 million dollar idea that will pull mastodon directly out of the dead water. hear me out.
@garfiald all right. so first off we know that the mastodon mastodon has become soft in recent years. the users no longer fear them
@garfiald and it is necessary, I believe, to threaten your users with some sort of villain, to increase the perceived valueof their posts
@garfiald and so me & the boys have invented "the mastoshitter". a fictional man who jumps up on instances and shits all over the users posts
@garfiald i know its fucked up. but "shit" is one of the last few apolitical threats. 99% of ppl on both sides of the spectrum dont like it
@garfiald this is money in the bank. put the mastoshitter in all mastodon branding, and enjoy a tenfold increase in userbase
@garfiald the current slogan, "Social networking, back in your hands", will no longer do. i would suggest replacing it with "Look out. Here comes the MastoShitter"
@garfiald it will go without saying that hes an ugly son of a bitch. goblin-like. someone you;d particularly not want shitting on your posts
@garfiald i would suggest studying caricatures from early 1900s racist war propaganda to help devise his gruesome appearance
@garfiald thats it. thank you for hearing me out. i am a huge fan of the"federal tl" and im nice once you get to know me
The social network of the future: No ads, no corporate surveillance, ethical design, and decentralization! Own your data with Mastodon!