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It turns out that @emdeesee had been saying "Like a Dog's Breakfast" when he meant "Like a Dog's Dinner"

Dog's breakfast→a mess

Dog's dinner→ostentatious and fancy

Dogs are weird.

BTW: I asked my wife, "If you were all gussied up to go out, you would be done up like the dog's ...?"

Her: "Breakfast!"

So it's not just me.