Jezebel’s scary story contest is eh this year

scary story in six words 

scary story in six words 

scary story in six words 

@checkervest

One universe to the left of ours, the entire planet has high-speed Internet. Participation in social media is not mandatory but it does deeply and directly impact political decisions. It seems okay but the ONLY platform available is Twitter!

@checkervest This is the third time you've asked, and I tell you the same one every time.

@checkervest There's a ghost in your house. You haven't seen it because it's scared of you after misunderstanding your name as "Alexa"

@checkervest you want a real one or a pretend one? i can do the first for sure, the second maybe

scary story 

@alexis ughh I was so afraid this was going to happen as soon as I heard hbo was getting involved with Sesame Street. Fuck that

@checkervest David Bowie didn't die in 2016. He has been taking all the cool people with him to a parallel universe, leaving us all behind in this shittier one.

@checkervest a couple's doberman was choking in the middle of the night so they sent him to the vet; later that night, the vet told them to get out of the house immediately. an hour later, there was a swat team who was carrying a man out from the basement with his pointer finger missing; the dog had swallowed and choked on a home invader's finger

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