Back in my day we used to take these big rocks and crunch 'em between our teeth, gnashing till our teeth turned to a powder of enamel shards that we'd have to drink and have it scratch down our throat like our esophagus had got caught in a shredder that's just braar braar braaring away and turning the whole thing into this mushy, blood soaked mess that we'd swallow and choke on and do you think we ever complained about that? No. Kids complain about everything. Try chewing on a rock for a change.