Is it okay to be upset at a vital project member for not being there enough any more?
Recently I've been playing on a game server I use to mod for and I now understand why I stopped.
Case study: Last month the server kept crashing. A miscoded mob attack sequence would crash the server ever time we encountered one. It took me ten minutes to push the fix. It took about as many days for the admin to show up and put everything into prod despite the frequent daily crashes.
I was furious at them. Why? Because they had been pinged a dozen of times on IRC about it, showed up when I wasn't there and didn't notice, then days later finally merged into prod for another reason altogether. It felt like the efforts I put into pulling those old outdated modded servers from oblivion were worthless.
I'm very much waiting for that project to die now. I don't want to work on something when my response to an urgent situation is ignored and end users suffer as a result.
Second sidenote: I now realise, after a lot of introspective work, that a lot of things weren't right with that project. It did end up making me mentally unable to code for, like, a *year* or so, when all the frustration and emotions and other stuff came crashing onto me.
The only thing I could begin to code after that was my school project for this year and for the first time I felt that spark again where I could create out of my imagination and be amazed when things ran like I wanted them to.