Good Boy Death @Witchsmeller@octodon.social

@cassolotl Haha, that's exactly how it goes. I have zero problems with the nub of the issue, but yeah the PR dept :)

@cassolotl I hear the last part, and I also hear the...tiredness with explaining (ironically, as you are now) but...I'm just reading your next one.... and that's my point in a nutshell. When it's so little know, but there's an assumption that people should know it and incorporate it into their life, and that they're a bigot if they haven't? That's a regretable assumption.

@cassolotl I think in this case, sincerely, the vast majority of cis people (Yeah, I get it and will use it appropriately :) ) simply would be amazed that not being aware of "being cis" is inherently transphobic. It's a massive bow to draw imo.

@cassolotl Yep, I hear you. But when the majority of people have no idea what it means, that's an issue.

@cassolotl It could simply boil down to me, but if I'm walking away with this feeling and I'm very "you be you, and I'll celebrate you for it (unless you're a fuckwith racist/scummo type" how must it be for other people less concerned?

@cassolotl Not quite a slur, but wholly dismissive. As if being who I am meant that I had nothing valid to say. Not even like a case of mansplaining, but a simple "Phhhht"

@cassolotl Now that I agree with every single word. Actually nearly everything you've said I agree with, but having a conversation is a much more pleasant route to enlightenment, if you get me.

@cassolotl Think ofit this way. First time I ever heard cis it was clearly used as a pejorative, and I had to look it up on wikipedia. It's like a double whammy. 9/10 people have no idea what it even means. I'm not against it in spirit, but a conversation is better than an order.

@cassolotl Yep, I hear you. However, if someone expects me to change with zero explanation, and calls me a bigot for not simply jumping to attention, well that's an issue. More of an approach problem than anything.

@cassolotl Because every time I've ever been labelled as it, it was with a spirit that said if I don't I'm a bigot! But with zero explanation as to why I should think differently. Think of it this way, trans people have generated a significant amount of understanding (literal, if not empathetic) in the general community. How did that happen?

@cassolotl Yep, I completely understand this. It could well be that I simply haven't understood how me being identified as cis actually assists, but thanks for this.

@cassolotl APologies, I've lost track of toots here. What is "it" in this case? :)

@CobaltVelvet That's a reasonable argument, and I will be giving it significant thought. Thanks for taking the time to actually make a good argument. In the past my experience of this has been
Me: I don't want to be labelled, cheers.
Others: BIGOT!

Literally this, and it shits me.

@cassolotl This is reasonable, yep.

@cassolotl The thing is, it's only in this instance where I'm called a bigot for not using it, even though I wouldn't use the others either.

So when someone says "see me for who I am, not the colour of my skin or my genitalia" that's what I try to do in my interactions. I work in an environment teeming with difference, and I likie people to be comfortable in their skin, just as I want to be.

@cassolotl Yes, absolutely. I recognise that and completely agree. However, is still doesn't mean I want to, or have to, choose to identify as cis. Do you see what I mean? To me it's yet another label, yet another divider.

@CobaltVelvet I simply don't want to be labelled in that way. I'm putting zero limitations upon how someone else identifies. In fact I celebrate them. Please explain how that is bigotry, using logic.