i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

okay so according to Earth: Final Conflict in the future (i don't actually know what year this is supposed to be taking place?) the superbowl will have been replaced by the World Bowl because countries all over the world will have embraced american football

sure

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

Augur has the show's equivalent of google glass

remember google glass? and how it totally changed all our lives in *checks notes* 2013? i mean where would we all be right now without our google glasses?

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

so the guy who faked his death way back in the pilot and who runs the resistance or something interrupts the broadcast of the "world bowl"

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

his name is doors i guess

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

that line's only funny if people are saying you're dead because of misinformation or a rumor or something

you faked your death so that's not - the line doesn't work here

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

yeah, it totally can be though

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

so the aliens are talking to each other and da'an says this weird shit about trust and then they all stop talking and there's a bunch of shots of them just being silent.

it's weird

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

this guy sandoval is the one who's loyal to the aliens and he's supposed to represent a threat to our "hero" William Boone but the actor playing him could not be any less threatening

he's not the worst actor in the universe or anything but he's so unimposing and like he seems i dunno, too cuddly or something. he's like nice. there's no threat there

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

the aliens are pissed that da'an didn't know that guy faked his death so they send this other alien called zo'or whose name is also pronounced as two syllables
i don't know why that even bothers me but it does

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

also zo'or seems like a prick

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

see in the future it's the WFL

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

lili talks to augur and it's a boring scene but he doesn't sniff her this time at least

then zo'or is a huge prick again and William Boone makes a silly face. it what he's best at

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

then we go to some bioengineering thing or something and what the fuck is going on with the guy with polka dots on his head? is that supposed to be like Fashion! of the future! or what? what is happening right now?

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

William Boone and da'an talk (this is a really boring ep btw) and then we cut back to the protesters and no one says anything about the polka dot guy
then this lady brings out a cow and everyone laughs because cows are funny i guess? even though they're there to protest the place and you'd think they'd be mad but no haha cow apparently

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

also the lady says they've engineered the cow to give ten times as much milk in half the time? which seems physically impossible and also pretty unpleasant for the cow

also i still wanna know what's going on with polka dot guy

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

this is the most boring ep so far. the last one with the killer robot bees was pretty fun but this is just...
i don't care about doors

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

butterflies. i meant killer robot butterflies

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

killer robot bees was an ep of black mirror that was terrible

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

William Boone and augur hack into some lady's day planner or something while Lwaxanna and sandoval go over the minutiae of doors faking his death
it's as exciting as it sounds

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

oh good i'm glad we're clearing up the power of attorney issue. i was on the edge of my seat about that

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

so through various events too tedious to describe William Boone contrives to gets Da'an his job back and somehow there's 8 mins left?

this is the first ep so far where i've been bored through most of it and it's not even over

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

lwaxanna sneaks William Boone and lili into a secret underground resistance base where doors is and it turns out augur was with the resistance the whole time

and it's still not over somehow

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

also doors is planning something he calls 'project metal scarecrow' with the butterfly machine from the amish ep

it still looks nothing like a scarecrow

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

then the aliens talk again and it finally ends

this was really boring. the previous eps were goofy and cheap and cheesy but they weren't boring at least. i hope this isn't going to be a trend

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret The twist ending is that it's all been a holodeck program of Riker's.

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret
That looks like Jamie Foxx before he turns into Electro

re: i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret wait... wait, did he make the butterfly machine that was making Amish people commit suicide? and this is a good thing somehow? what?

re: i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s, a bit dark 

@troodon
@Taweret
It is when you have a machine that creates free energy from suicides.

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret was this written by one or more of the Enterprise writers?

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret I don't think we've talked enough about how bad a title "Earth: Final Conflict" is.

It is *very* bad.

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret You notice this show usually ends like an episode of 'Mork and Mindy'?

Just Imagine Da'an is played by Robin Williams in his prime.

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret

they're really sticking with this metal scarecrow bit for a while

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@mal when the props department built something that looked nothing like a scarecrow, it they didn't have time or money to build something else, they could've just changed the word?

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i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret Sounds like...Portnoy's complaint!

(thank you, I'm here all week)

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret That's a weird way to say "twenty times as much milk".

...like, it's not like cows make milk in indivisible batches you have to wait until it finishes a batch.

It doesn't come out in jugs.

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret Head polka-dots are 100% more believable than any civilian fashion that has ever appeared in Star Trek.

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret
See that the professional cereal eating scene has gotten way more violent.

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret This leaves me with the same question as Star Trek's baseball episodes : London England? Or London Ontario?

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@apLundell @Taweret Definitely England. The London Monarchs were a real team in the (NFL-backed) World League of American Football.

re: i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret ew... is the entire species made of smug assholes? yeah they're interstellar sex tourists, deffo

re: i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret this line is super hilarious if you pretend he's just talking about, like, random doors. "WE WILL BRING YOU SO MANY DOORS"

i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret

ahh but steph, you see, that's why he's dangerous!

re: i watch Earth: Final Conflict a terrible Canadian scifi show from the 90s 

@Taweret "look you trusted me with deciding on an insurance company, just because I ate that *one* guy that *one* time now you won't let me in your house any more"

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