TQ, activist aspect @TQ@octodon.social

Time for a little Update on how I use my accounts:
@TQ ☄ is my main account. Posts switch between English and German, and I toot about more general stuff.
@TQ 💫 is my smol, private account. Toots auf deutsch, nur Freund*innen!
@TQ ✏ is my artsy account, there I post sketches and abstract paintings! It's wuite active these days!
@TQ 🐍 is my coding account, which I use only when I have a project.
I also often boost posts from my 2 "special" accounts over on my main.
Feel free to follow or mute. ❤

Thank you all. I'm a bit better. Not good, because... How? I fail to understand.

I don't understand my brother. He sides with a parent who hit him, cursed him, screamed at him over and over again, then ignored his teenage existence for a while year. How can he side with him?! How does he see our family as "not as bad as you paint it"? Just HOW?

I don't see how I can get out of this... I'm only setting strict boundaries, but my brother tries to force me to make peace. Is this gaslighting?

I'm shocked at how my younger brother downplays emotional and even physical abuse by my father. Guess I'm not the only one who blamed me - he seems to blame me, too.
He says things like how many sacrifices my father made for his children. And justifies continuous aggressive behavior.

Please tell me that this is not ok? Please? I can't tell any more!

Fuck, fuck, fuck! My brother tries to 'negotiate', heavily blames me, basically doesn't believe me but my abusive father, downplays even physical abuse by him and makes everything so much worse.
I hate this dysfunctional family! I just want to be left alone!

I'm in a bad place...

I just wish it was easier. I wish the rest of the family was on my side. I wish I could change everything.

Got a mail from my father. Basically blamed me for his behaviour, fell back to "I pray every day" and tried to apologize - to my husband.
Yeah. shit's fucked up. I wrote an okayish answer I guess. Told him if he wasn't able to contain his aggression, I'm forced to contain him. Told him that praying seems to bee too little, he should look for help.
Which he won't. He'll keep on blaming others. He can't stomach the ugly truth of being the aggressor.

Okay, I'm definitely feeling better today. Could be because of any of these things:
- took these medicaments
- went to bead really early
- wore a scarf to bed to keep my neck warm
Will drink some tea now and have a calm and relaxed day at work - hopefully.

Okay, the sore throat is gone. This is miraculous, I thought I was at the point of no return. Will keep you posted.

This is what was recommended against my beginning cold. I'll keep you posted if it's any good.