Steve Johnson @SteveJohnson@octodon.social

If you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

Human beings really only live for about 4 minutes, but each time you breathe it resets the counter.

Someday when robots take over website development, they will have humans.txt files and captchas that keep humans from commenting. #webdev #future

Just now imagining how much more horrible life would be if license plate numbers were the same as phone numbers.

Peter Piper could not have picked a peck of pickled peppers because peppers don't grow pickled.

Was here today for the first time in my life... #StLouis, #travel. Currently holed in Effingham, IL for the night. But I couldn't believe what shit hole East St. Louis is.

Just now realized that if Bill O'Reilly had been born a hobbit, his name could have been Bilbo Reilly. #foxnews

When in Wichita, do as the witches do. Eat barbecue. (Hog Wild Pit Bar-B-Q, Whichita, KS).

People who live in glass houses should not throw orgies.

Why can't my "smartphone" automatically answer incoming calls, determine if they are a robot solicitor, and then hang up on them?

Mastodon would be way more awesome if it could interface with somekind of translation engine that automatically kicked in based on your preferred language.

Def Leppard is the safest music to air drum to while driving because you can keep one hand on the steering wheel.

Is it just me, or is teaching abstinence in a sex ed class the same as teaching people to take the bus in a driver's ed class?

If it's wrong to go to a grocery store when you're hungry, is it also wrong to go to a sex shop when you're horny?

I grew up so poor, that my mom said the "B" in a BLT stands for bread.

Is it correct to assume that responsible people are removing themselves from the gene pool because they practice contraception?

Oh, and its so cold outside that I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

I've just been told that my Procrastinators Anonymous meeting was postponed.

While I still enjoy Google+ as a social media outlet ( Its still has a more mature audience than FB and Tw), the political discussions are terribly partisan. I'll note that I started a political discussion here on octodon.social some days back, trying to chat from an open mind, only to discover that no one wants to discuss, except for one gal who was terribly close minded. I guess a good thing that political discussions on Mastodon are few and far between if any.

Just realized that we can thwart the zombie apocalypse by tying dead peoples shoelaces together.