Siri's UK voice reading out romantic emoticons from my wife sounds like a demented sex Dalek: "Face blowing a kiss! Face blowing a kiss! Face blowing a kiss!"
Where are all the moderate whites loudly denouncing the Finsbury Park attack on behalf of their people?
Today in history: Once-ler/Lorax negotiations fail. Planet held hostage, casualties likely. Truffula futures surge. Barbaloot outlook grim.
On Autism & Minecrafting - http://www.metafilter.com/167257/You-Aut-to-Try-Minecraft
Pretty sure I'm dying of hypochondria.
By now many of you have heard the news about German Supreme Chancellor Merkel's secret underground abattoir for baby eating, revealed so explosively by citizen-investigators and a self-aware Japanese AI named "Otaku Marshmallow Girl" inhabiting the body of a BBW-positive mannequin and posted using code words on a semi-censored Weibo stream. The implications for our democracy are obvious: this is a slippery slope to mandatory hijab-wearing, state-sponsored veganism, and unfettered science.
Monsters Inc as prophecy: instead of a "scream"-powered world, ours is energized by commodified outrage. If this outrages you, click here.
Despite all evidence I'm convinced there exists a sophisticated clandestine global movement causing morons to believe conspiracy theories.
On the way to pay my taxes I like to thank a firefighter, salute a soldier, and hump a mailbox.
