I remembered why I had that feeling of dread.
And I wished I hadn't.
It had something to do with that person I emailed a while back.
I'm scared that he won't give me the answer I want.


I've been trying to get an answer out of them for almost a year now, and they've taken around half a year to respond the first time I reached out to them. Another 6 months and they told me to "ask me again later"
I really need their answer right now because it's one of my main concerns. It's directly tied to my anxiety because they just mentioned it without actually referring to it by name. And I'm really scared of the thing because I don't know the current status of that thing.

It's because of this person that I desperately need to go to therapy.
But I'm scared because therapy can't change anything about that thing.

I remember back on September 28th, 2014 when this type of anxiety first appeared to me.
I saw a YouTube video about the thing in question and it disturbed me for a fairly long two months, it was until November 14th that it went away, when I had it hammered into my mind from another event that the thing I was scared about was not going to happen.


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