The family teen is texting me memes she thinks are funny and they make no sense because I am old.

I feel like the mice who are running the Earth 2 experiment are specifically trying to see how much stress they can put me through this morning before I start politely freaking out.

What happens when you look up your medical symptoms and the internet doesn't tell you it's your period, your weight, or cancer? Do you win something?

I keep finding four leaf clovers, so this one is for you folks. It comes with a little nibble taken out of it, which makes it cuter?

I am going to grow lavender this year, or go mad trying.

I wrote just the scathingest book review of a true crime novel for class. It got nasty. Like, I broke the story of the author's DUI and assault charges midreview and drew a parallel between her and the criminal she wrote about. I DID Google the author to make sure it wasn't the professor or the professor's spouse, but I'm still nervous.

Gonna splurge and have two cups of coffee this morning. Really living it up over here!

The puppy used to wake up between 6 and 630am, but now inexplicably it is between 5 and 530? I am so tired. But also, this is how the puppy says goodnight, to me and only me. Just wraps herself around my head and nibbles my hair or licks my pillow. It's hard to be mad at her.

One of the cats is going to the dentist this morning so on the way, I played her The Hand That Feeds by NIN, which is unsurprisingly from the album With Teeth because I have to have a reason to laugh while a cat yowls in the back seat. She was actually pretty chill! Just little meows? Trent Reznor, kitty cat whisperer.

Today I picked up the cutest hitchhiker. I got him some dinner and helped him find his way home.

Midterms are next week, I am looking after a small puppy, and now this:

I got some extra sleep and then got a few things that have been bothering me fixed and I feel so good about it. I didn't do anything but function, but...I functioned!

The best character in Bewitched is Endora. She slinks around like a cat and whispers "Why are any of you doing this? Everything could be so much easier!" And she is god-damned right.

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